AT First…

I started off just writing a very professional article about Representative Pete Vasclosky (D-IN) and the PMA scandal, it was a small article but I was being paid for it so I decided to be serious. Shortly after I had begun the process of researching this terrible mess, I threw away all semblance of professionalism and instead replaced it with Divine Wrath. Amassing a plethora of files, articles, interviews, and financial records which I dug up using the internet, my wrath was quickly enough replaced by the sobering realization that I could not in any manner string together these facts to make serious sense while in an unholy rage. The only solution for a subject which I saw as grim and dreary was to begin drinking and smoking heavily until a certain serene state of mind was achieved.

In the true fashion of my fore-fathers, I overdid it, ending up on the floor of my bedroom, screaming incoherently at people on the phone. Many of them humored me in good spirit, which is a very nice thing to do for some drunken freak babbling about politics with vague allusions to the Military/Industrial complex and the 2010 mid-term elections. After consulting with people from all across the country on this issue (which has so far not only been watered down by the media but has even been fluoridated), I decided that it would be in the best interest of everyone if I would just sleep on it and pick it up the next day.

Intoxication soon gave way to a despicable apathy which was not my own. I had spent hours reading the responses of people to the various articles which had been posted online regarding the subject. The only people who were interested enough in the story to respond to it fell into one of three demographics: apathy and contempt for “another lobbying scandal”, those who acted in a lower-brain reflexive instinct which is known as “two-party bias”, and those who had joined my Crusade after being yelled at for a while. Contemplating these vile and loathsome facts and nursing an insufferable hangover, I came to the conclusion that the only course of action was to entice enough of demographic one over to demographic three.

And so this is why I have laid aside all heaviness, rage, and apathy to deliver a message to the Uninterested masses about Why They Should Give a Fuck about the PMA scandal and everything surrounding it (its blast radius, if you will). Two, and only two things are therefore required for this article: facts and a sense of fun.

A Member, Delegate, Resident Commissioner, or employee of the House may not receive compensation and may not permit compensation to accrue to his beneficial interest from any source, the receipt of which would occur by virtue or influence improperly exerted by his position in the Congress.

-House Rule XXIII

The Characters, Cast, and Crew

(of dangerous and despicable degenerates)

Before the tirade against the scum begins, I first need to acquaint you with the various people  involved in this situation. Let us start off where most of this action takes place: Washington D.C., perhaps one of the many sleek and sexy clubs or restaurants where lobbyists and law-makers (and bribe-takers) wine & dine each other while groping the many young female interns that they lust over. Imagine yourself at one of these clubs, staring at a group of fat and sweaty bastards, clutching their groins in desire for a rack of lamb and a hot piece of perhaps you. Your brain is bubbling and buzzing, and in a a surreal daze you find yourself walking over to this table, they appear to be a group of jolly businessmen, entertaining each other with expensive drinks, meals, and tobacco products. Shaking hands with them, you decide to sit down and join in on their little party.

As they begin telling horrible, nauseating jokes it suddenly dawns on you that these are no businessmen but rather Congressmen. A sharp intake of breath overtakes you as you recognize these pitiful faces, you have seen them on Television, representing the collective ideals of the American nation. Now, as you sit across from them, enjoying some of the finest lobster you have ever had courtesy of your new friends, they are several verses deep in “Satisfaction” by the Rolling Stones. The irony is not lost on you.

At this point you are likely cursing the author, wishing he would get to the damn point and stop dredging up strange fantasies borne from the darkest pits of the netherworld. “But,” the author would calmly explain, “This is no fantasy. This really took place: I have merely paraphrased and put my own artistic spin on a stunning Vanity Fair article which was written a few months after September 11th, 2001. It is of course completely fair for me to do so, as I am an Artist and do not stand to gain monetarily by this.” While this explanation leave you feeling uneasy, you can not deny the deplorable truth of the words. In order to get the stench of congressmen off of your skin & psyche, you take many showers and even consider a Napalm Bath.

Now then, for some names, which are very close to facts. Most of those people were democratic congressmen that do not directly fit into the big picture. There is, however, one person that stands at the center of this debacle: former member of the Appropriations Subcommittee on Defense and founder of the now defunct PMA Lobbying Group…Paul Magliocchetti! Give him a round of applause, folks! Better yet, tar and feather him…

The PMA group is apparently (or allegedly) responsible for convincing at least seven (maybe even twelve) congressmen on the defense committee just mentioned in order to steer federal funds towards PMA clients. Most of which, coincidentally, are in the business of weapons, chemicals, electronics, or other fields related to military and defense.

According to an article done by the Washington Times, the seven congressmen involved include: John P. Murtha (D-PA and pictured extensively with a few touch-ups done in Photoshop on this site), Peter J. Visclosky (D-In), James P. Moran Jr. (D-Va), Norm Dicks (D-Wash), Marcy Kaptur (D-Ohio), C.W. Bill Young (R-Fla), as well as Todd Tiahrt (R-Kan). The fact that there are both democrats and republicans involved to some degree should be reason enough to disperse with party-bias bickering and get down to trying to actually tackle the issue. The issue is of course, massive corruption which is going for the most part unnoticed and without much hopes of any justice, as you will soon see. Then, to the chagrin of Apathetic Amerika, we shall move onto the meat of this vicious and bloody story: what happened, what it means, and why you should care.

“Point: journalism is not about plans & spreadsheets, it’s about human reaction and criminal enterprise. Here the lesson begins.”

-Transmetropolitan

What Happened?

Roughly a year ago, in the cold and decaying months of November, the PMA lobbying group was raided mercilessly by the FBI. Apparently the PMA group’s huge annual income and even bigger list of clients & congressmen donated to had caused it to come under scrutiny, and after being raided by the authorities an investigation soon ensued regarding what amounts to bribery. Personally I detest all the technical and legislative jargon involved in such political cases, as they tend to do nothing more than obscure the actions at hand. Several weeks later the PMA lobbying group decided that business had gone sour, but the market was still ripe, so PMA itself was disbanded while several high-level members went on to create a new lobbying group – Flagship Government Relations. For fun, I’ve decided to include a list and put in italics all the members which belong to both groups:

PMA Lobbying Group Members:

• Anderson, Paul Theodore
• Boessen, Joseph
• Cunningham, Daniel A
• Efford, Rich
• Fleming, Don
• Fogarty, Sean
• Giardina, Julie
• Green, Kaylene
• Hamilton, Mark
• Hawkins, John
• Kaelin, Rich
• Koloszar, Melissa A
• Littleton, Joseph
• Lynch, John J
• Magliocchetti, Mark
• Magliocchetti, Paul
• Miller, Kevin
• Miller, Matthew
• Morgan, Brian
• Roberts, Elizabeth
• Shades, Briggs
• Smith, Charles
• Sparta, Joseph
• Thiel, Brian
• Tomasulo, Kelli Short
• Vandesand, Scott
• Veltri, Thomas
• Woods, Glen
• Zink, Judith L

Flagship Government Relations Members:

• Anderson, Paul Theodore
• Cunningham, Daniel A
• Efford, Rich
• Fleming Don
• Fogarty, Sean
• Giardina, Julie
• Lynch, John J
• Miller, Kevin
• Smith, Charles
• Tomasulo, Kelli Short
• Vandesand, Scott
• Woods, Glenn

Yes, you’ve got that right. Flagship Government Relations is basically the PMA lobbying group except slightly smaller. A few articles reported that after the breakup of the PMA lobbying group, “a few” ex-PMA lobbyists went off to make their own little club. Either they were misinformed, or they were understating the facts, because right here is a full list of a dozen people, all of which are from and only from the PMA lobbying group. There is not one inkling of new blood, not one sign that anything at all will be different from what we have seen in the past.

I find it in extremely bad taste to focus all of ones attention & energy only on those that seem to be the “most corrupt” or what have you: in this case Paul Magliocchetti, Pete Visclosky, John Murtha, and a few others seem to take the cake and all the spotlight. There were plenty of other people involved in this scandal, and we should hold every single god damn one of them responsible! Why the hell not? We’ve got to start somewhere, and this is a good a place as any. Considering that this is fairly recent, ongoing, directly affecting current events such as the latest defense spending bill (more on that later), and has not been covered properly by the media…why, this is perfect! Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, or rather, let’s not cause the author to jump ten subjects in a single bound, much like superman on steroids and speed.

Now then, the point I was making is that there are plenty of other players in this mess that have not been talked about very much. If you take a look at the financial records of congressmen and senators that the PMA lobbying group donated to, the first thing you’ll notice is that they basically donated to everyone with a pulse. Some interesting information though: both John McCain and Hilary Clinton were in the top 10 for biggest donations received. To highlight some points, here’s a small list:

7. John McCain – $482,813

10. Hillary Clinton – $383,733

23. John Kerry – $282,294

30. Joe Lieberman – $253,900

41. Thad Cochran – $213,961

110. Ron Paul – $113,470

369. Joe Biden – $12,750

406. Al Franken – $8,100

I have tried contacting a few of these people via e-mail, but it seems that this is Not the Way to Go, at least not if you want to actually get a response from any of them. The thought of calling their offices, or whatever place you get redirected to when you’re some crazed dope-freak yelling about lobbying scandals and “Just what exactly did Mr. Franken think of these people? Did he meet with them? Do they wear ties, or merely the tongues of their enemies? Have you sold your soul to the devil, too?” Most of all, though, I wonder…What will all the Ron Paul freaks think of when they find out that their glory boy from Texas, heralded as some little old-man who will fight for Freedom and wrest away the Constitution from those Fascists. At least, this is what Alex Jones likes to say to himself while himself off in his expensive cars, snorting cocaine out of that fabulous device known as a “bullet”…It is true, I heard this all from some paranoid-schizophrenic speed-freak that used to work on Mr. Jones radio show, and as such he is obviously a highly reliable source on such matters and you should take my words as de facto truth.

Right? Just making sure you’re still paying attention, this is after all a fairly long article for Apathetic Amerika, and only cheap shots at the character of public figures will keep you savages interested. Backpedaling a bit, I would like to lightly touch upon a subject Alex Jones is obviously highly connected with: the conspiracy theory angle. No, I do not have a conspiracy theory of my own, nor do I keep track with this or that theory, though I do consider myself well read. The thing that bothers me is that after searching for a bit, I could find very, very little about this scandal or anyone related on the various conspiracy theory websites, blogs, etc. Why is this? Is it just not interesting if it doesn’t involve 9/11? Well, sorry folks, but everything involves 9/11 these days.

Enough of that, I have thoroughly damaged my credibility enough, although you’d think that a few cheap shots would count for much less than say, being a chairman of the House Appropriations Subcommittee on Energy and Water Development and taking bribes & inserting “earmarks” (what a detestable word! how vulgar, how repulsive to all good taste!) to whatever bill might be handy. Indeed, Pete Visclosky is allegedly guilty of some or most of that, and what is his punishment? Has he resigned? Is he going to be held accountable for his actions? The short answer, folks, is no. He has stepped down from voting on one bill, after which he will resume business as usual. I have foreseen it not only in the stars but also in all the reports available at this time.

The worst part is this sham of an investigation they’re conducting. Of course, it’s fairly well known that these “investigations” add up to little more than a slap on the wrist, “Ethics committee investigations are not uncommon. Most result in private letters that either exonerate or reprimand a member. In some rare instances, the censure is more severe.” But never mind, let’s take a look at some congressional records, available for you to view right here.

Mr. FLAKE. Madam Speaker, I have
a parliamentary inquiry.

The SPEAKER pro tempore. The gentleman
will state his parliamentary inquiry.
Mr. FLAKE. I just saw the resolution.
I don’t know if it actually just
punts the ball until the appropriations
cycle is done or if it actually requires
that the committee investigate.
Can the committee wait for 45 days
and then announce that it is not investigating
the PMA scandal, and then
we’re at the same place we are now?
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The
Chair cannot interpret the pending resolution.
It is available at the desk for
review.
Mr. FLAKE. Further parliamentary
inquiry.

The SPEAKER pro tempore. The gentleman
will state his further parliamentary
inquiry.
Mr. FLAKE. This resolution, as I understand
it, does not require the Committee
on Standards of Official Conduct
to do anything but report whether
or not an investigation is occurring.
Does this motion require any action
on the part of the Committee on Standards
of Official Conduct?
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The
pending motion is to refer the resolution
to committee.
Mr. FLAKE. So no action is required.

Mr. BOEHNER. Madam Speaker, I
have a parliamentary inquiry.
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The gentleman
will state his parliamentary inquiry.
Mr. BOEHNER. Madam Speaker, does
this motion do anything other than
refer this worthless piece of paper to
the Ethics Committee?
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The proposal
is to refer the resolution to committee.
Mr. BOEHNER. Further parliamentary
inquiry.
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The gentleman
will state his further parliamentary
inquiry.
Mr. BOEHNER. Does it require the
Committee on Standards of Official
Conduct to do anything?
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The proposal
before the body is to refer the
resolution to committee.
Mr. BOEHNER. Parliamentary inquiry.

The SPEAKER pro tempore. The gentleman
will state his further parliamentary
inquiry.
Mr. BOEHNER. If the House were to
adopt this motion, this resolution,
would it require the committee to do
anything?
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The
measure would be referred to committee
for its consideration.
Mr. BOEHNER. Further parliamentary
inquiry.

The SPEAKER pro tempore. The gentleman
will state his further parliamentary
inquiry.
Mr. BOEHNER. If the House were to
adopt this motion to refer this to the
Committee on Standards of Official
Conduct, under the previous announcement
from the Chair, the Committee
on Standards of Official Conduct would
be required to do nothing.
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The
committee would have referral of the
resolution.
Mr. BOEHNER. And nothing else?
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The
committee would have referral of the
resolution.
Mr. FLAKE. Madam Speaker, I have
a parliamentary inquiry.
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The gentleman
will state his parliamentary inquiry.
Mr. FLAKE. Does the resolution require
that the committee report back
in 45 days or 45 legislative days?
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The
Chair cannot interpret the resolution.
It is available for inspection.
Mr. FLAKE. Madam Speaker, the
reason I ask is because within 45 days,
the appropriations cycle will likely be
completed.
The SPEAKER pro tempore. The gentleman
is not stating a parliamentary
inquiry. Without objection, the previous question
is ordered.
Mr. PRICE of Georgia. I object.
The SPEAKER pro tempore. Objection
is heard.
The question is on ordering the previous
question.
The previous question was ordered.

Oh, ho-ho! Quite an interesting exchange, no? Congress isn’t so boring after all. But nevermind that, the important this is – what happened? What’s happened to this investigation?

Ethics Inquiries Close for Four Lawmakers

Four House members may escape an ethics cloud going into the 2010 elections, now that the Office of Congressional Ethics has closed its investigation into their relationships to the lobbying firm PMA Group and has advised against a formal House investigation.

The OCE decision affects Democratic Reps. John P. Murtha of Pennsylvania, Norm Dicks of Washington and James Moran of Virginia. The decision for the three Democrats was announced Dec. 18.

On Dec. 19, the office of Republican Rep. Bill Young of Florida announced the OCE had closed its investigation into the lawmaker and his ties to the now-defunct lobbying firm and advised against further investigation by the House ethics committee.

George Behan, Dicks’ chief of staff, said the OCE, which reviews potential rules violations and refers investigations to the House ethics committee, informed the Washington lawmaker on Dec. 2 that it had recommended the inquiry be dismissed.

“In his case, there was never anything there,” Behan said.

Murtha spokesman Matt Mazonkey and Moran spokeswoman Emily Blout confirmed their respective lawmakers received similar letters.

“The Board of the Office of Congressional Ethics recommends that the Committee on Standards of Official Conduct dismiss the above allegations,” the OCE report issued to Moran’s office states. The one-page document indicates the board made a unanimous vote, 6-0.

According to the report, the OCE examined earmarks that Moran designated for PMA clients in fiscal 2009, as well as contributions that he received during the 2008 and 2010 cycles from PMA’s political action committee and its employees, and from PMA clients and their PACs.

The OCE report states that it reviewed whether Moran could have violated federal bribery, gratuity and gift statutes, as well as House rules.

“I appreciate the panel’s thorough investigation and carefully considered and unanimous decision to dismiss what were from the outset baseless charges. If the vindication and dismissal of the matter gets one-tenth of the visibility that the allegation assumed, I’ll be pleased,” Moran said in a statement.

The OCE has never publicly confirmed its investigation into PMA, but a confidential ethics document leaked in October showed the office reviewing seven lawmakers — Dicks, Murtha and Moran, as well as Reps. Peter J. Visclosky , D-Ind., Marcy Kaptur , D-Ohio, Todd Tiahrt , R-Kan., and Young — in the matter.

According to a copy of that document published on the Web site Wikileaks.org, the OCE investigation focused on whether members accepted contributions or other items of value from PMA’s PAC in exchange for official acts.

PMA employees and clients were leading donors to Murtha, Visclosky, Moran, Dicks and other appropriators, and received multiple earmarks from these and other members.

Why does this not surprise me? Might it be that anyone with a bit of political instincts in their bones totally saw this coming, as soon as they got into the story. It’s been a sad & despicable journey, folks, and it looks like it’s going nowhere. I was originally planning on including a conclusion that would outline some actions we, as citizens, could take to remedy the situation. However, at this time I can’t come up with anything.

I haven’t given up though, and I’m not going to plunge into apathy, depression, and excessive nihilism. I will, however, have a drink or two. Expect updates(as well as plenty of editing) on the story every so often, as I’m not going to give this up, and I hope you don’t, either…

yours in scandal and charade,

the Nihilizo

Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats.

-H.L. Mencken